Robots and tampons and dice oh my.  What could this be?  It’ll be something, that’s for sure.


Special Trek: The Unknown Closet E-Book


Another magnificent e-book short story.

A rather ordinary day on the USS Magic Carrot turns rather special when Captain Andy’s happy talk dinner is interrupted by something that must be explored.

Download it free in a variety of e-book formats here.

Hiding Gollum


(Frodo, Sam, and Gollum are in a mountain pass, bedding down for the night)

G: Give me the ring! I wants it!
F: No! Never!

(Gollum drags his finger up and down his chest)

G: Drop your pants and let me show you how much I wants it.
F: No!
S: Well…
F: Sam!
S: Sorry!

(Everyone beds down and goes to sleep, except Gollum isn’t really asleep)

G: Stupid hobbits! Going to sleep with me here. Now I can gets the ring!

(Gollum sneaks over to Frodo and takes the ring from him)

G: It’s mine!

(Frodo and Sam sit up at the same time)

F: What?
S: Huh?

(Frodo and Sam sing in unison)

F & S: The ring! The ring! Who’s got the ring!

(Gollum shoves the ring up his butt)

G: Aaaooo!

(Gollum farts and a column of flame shoots out of his butt, then he runs off-screen)